The family suffers with the loss of a dementia patient. Most have noticed the signs and some may be relieved with the diagnosis. When my father was diagnosised it explained a lot of behavior we were attributing to personality. However, the explanation did not make the diagnosis any easier. Sometimes we think an explanation or a reason makes things easier to take. Not so.
The family will be relieved when their loved one is placed in a care facility, but they will also feel guilty. This is similar to survivor guilt. They may find it difficult to enjoy life or feel bad if they have a good time while dad or mom is suffering. The care facility can help by demonstrating care and love for their family member. Know them by name and smile when their name is mentioned, even over the phone. Our voice sounds different when spoken through a smile then a frown.
Know the patient’s routines and be able to talk to the family about it. This will ensure them that you are watching and caring. Beyond anything else this will make the most difference.
Secondly, stay in touch. It is easier for everyone if the facility initiates the calls. To the family it demonstrate care and responsibility. For the facility, it allows you to call on your schedule instead of interrupting phone calls all day long.
